I don't think I have ever had less and been more satisfied than anytime in my entire life.
Let me attempt to explain.
I do not own any vehicle and have no furniture. I recently gave most of my savings away. I have no house nor husband, no kids and two suitcases of clothes in the USA with some storage in Thailand. I have some gifts from Thailand, a loaned camera, two iPhones -- one I am now paying off because I had to purchase it once I got to the USA last month. I recently paid my taxes and I have some money in my bank account… that's about it for material possessions.
So what do I have?
Jesus.
That's JESUS (period). And He is more than enough. God, the best Dad ever, has given me EVERYTHING I need for life and godliness.
Right now I am at the tip of an island point in Puget Sound watching the moon rise over the calm water. A strategically placed driftwood points back up at the moon like a hand gesturing to heaven. I could sit here all night talking to my Bridegroom. He's given me this place to live in this incredibly quiet neighborhood. He's given me this peace and this undeserved piece of heaven.
And that's just it. I'm not here because of anything I put together. I simply believed God's voice, I asked for prayer when it was offered and Holy Spirit brought it to mind and here I am. Two weeks and one day at a beautiful cabin in the wilderness into one of the most refreshing times of my life.
My Daily LIFE now
Not eating, so no responsibility to make any meals or times to plan when the next one is to come. It's summer break from school I teach at, so no lesson plans to put in order or strategic class classroom management moves to try to anticipate. I've been given a place to care for with all the amenities -- running water, hot shower, plenty of extra blankets for the chilly weather that I am getting accustomed to. Neighbors close enough, not not too close to sense safety but have silent nights.
A church community that is warm and on-fire for Jesus, with the same verse printed above their door that the Lord gave me a month before I knew this place even existed -- Matthew 11:28. I have such a quiet Spirit, I hear His voice so clearly, I've had plenty of opportunity for Him to display His power when I venture outside my brightly lit cabin paradise.
And, as if that isn't enough, Holy Spirit. Holy Spirit's intimate presence fills every minute, every room, every trail walk, every marina venture, every beach excursion -- there He is.
Everywhere. Even here right now as I write this. Next to me, in me, all around me, encouraging me to write every word. His beautiful unending presence.
Even if the moonlight has now been hidden by the clouds and I sit here in darkness on the beach, his light envelops me. I am His. He dwells in unapproachable light and that light surrounds me – and nothing anyone can say or do will ever change that.
That's the power of Jesus's blood. The all–consuming, never changing, Almighty power of the blood of Jesus Christ.
Before I knew Him and the POWER of His blood
That power took a lost, hurting, little girl, who tried to fill the void in her heart with what the world said: education, boyfriends, possessions, a great career, tons of friends -- all at of the cost of fear, condemnation, guilt and shame -- and He put my feet upon a rock. With an incurable virus, tons of debt, lonely nights, terrible thoughts of insignificance, insecurity and my future all followed close behind.
With the history of parents who didn't know Whose they were either -- an alcoholic dad who rarely showed up in my childhood and even less in my adolescence and with a mom addicted to drugs, alcohol and control of people–they separated when I was young. I felt abandoned, my mom raised me going to friends houses where they were doing drugs all the time, she wanted to give me life advice that I never wanted to agree with – even though I loved both of them, I became so fed up, so I felt like doing the opposite of what they said and rebelling. That was not better, but it put me on a path to try to figure out who this Jesus was that I never knew.
There I was.
Miserable.
Miserable but with a smile of vengeance on my face trying to prove this all–loving, ever-present and all-powerful myth of a Creator was concocted by a bunch of misguided lunatics who just needed something to take their pain away or blame their problems on. How could a good God allow me to be abused repeatedly at seven years old and then have "family friends" molest me into my teenage years. Where was this all–powerful Deity then, huh?!?
Then to know what I learned trying to prove Him false. I really found the Truth! The truth that this amazing all-loving God would create people in His image, prone to be like God, but that would abuse the free will that only a loving Father can give–and they would hurt the very ones they were supposed to love, protect and train in the way they should go…
The REALITY of SIN
God is not the cause of the destruction, problems or breakdown in the world. That's the enemy trying to reproduce himself in the hearts of us. And us, rebellious children that don't honor their parents or the One who created us. With just two simple guidelines: Love God and love people as He loves us.
FREE from Me
So that's where I am today. Free. Free from all the condemnation, guilt, shame and fear that not obeying God causes. Here I am living by the Spirit.
If Holy Spirit tells me to move, I'm free to move. I don't have any idols of the world, somebody else's opinion -- like a controlling spouse or unreasonable boss -- no schedules, or restraints of being in a hurry to get nowhere, I'm not controlled by my stomach or anyone else's, I go to bed when He tells me… I just get to listen to my Bridegroom, my best Friend, my Father, my King, my Judge, my Abba encourage me when I ask Him what's next?!?
Outside of a honeymoon, I can't describe this time any other way.
Does this have to end?
Well, the outpouring of his love won't. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
But in some respects, yes. It has to end, a little. I will eventually need to eat, start to work and be on a schedule to meet others to bless them and ask for their blessing for my future and the future of the projects that God is challenging us to believe for in Thailand, North Korea and in Asia. Yes, I will have to begin paying some bills, begin working where the Lord leads me, so I will have expectations and schedules of others to follow.
And in some respects, no. No, this honeymoon never has to end. Unbridled time with the lover of my soul, endless conversations about how in love with me He is, and receiving all the blessings He has to pour out, that time is the way He meant it. That's what the Bible says. It says in Psalm 139 that His thoughts outnumber all the grains of sand on the seashores in all the world.
Have you ever seen one seashore?
Just take the one I am on now. It's probably only half mile long and it's got a LOT of sand. I mean a LOTTA LOT. That's a lot of thoughts. If we could comprehend a handful of those thoughts even, it would blow our mind.
Just try it.
Take a handful of sand.
Start thinking about the person you love the most.
Pick up one grain of sand and start telling them those thoughts… See how far you get!
God loves me. He's thinking of me (and you!) and He's never going to stop for all of eternity! Wow! That's mind blowing.
And we're supposed to walk in that love.
As Jesus walked.
How I am to LIVE
Imitating our Dad, God, as beloved children. That's what beloved means -- walking in love as Jesus loved us. Giving himself up for us not with a stinky attitude of love – but a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.
Look carefully then and how you walk not as unwise but as wise. Making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. Be filled with the spirit, addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart. Giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, submitting to one another out of reverence to Christ.
Not grumbling or complaining, but letting from my mouth flow living water that blesses the hearer and reminds them Whose they are… Who created them holy and blameless without a single fault, above reproach before Jesus, if indeed they continue to walk in faith, stable and steadfast, not shifting from the hope which has been proclaimed in all creation under heaven. For The wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men who by their unrighteousness suppress the truth.
For what can be known about God is plain to them because God has shown it to them. For his invisible attributes, namely his eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived. Ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made. So they are without excuse.
And Jesus is the visible image of the invisible God the firstborn of all creation. For although the people knew God, they did not honor him is God or give thanks to Him, but they became futile in their thinking and started thinking about themselves and their foolish hearts were darkened. Claiming to be wise they became fools… their wisdom was earthly, and unspiritual, it was sensual, all about their feelings and demonic.
When we begin to say, "I feel like God is like this, and I think He would be okay with…" We need to be very sure that what comes next is wisdom that is pure, and peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by us who make peace and by what we say. And peace is speaking the truth in love, living by the Spirit– that dwells in us, as a temple of the living God.
God yearns jealously over the spirit that he is made to dwelling us, but God gives more grace. Because "He opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble." Submit yourselves therefore to God, living righteously. Then you resist the devil and he will flee. That humility needs to come as we say, "I think He'll be okay with…" Are we asking Him? Are we asking Holy Spirit what the Father is okay with? We need to humble ourselves before the Lord and he will exalt us. Our thinking can become His thinking when we ask…
To live peaceful doesn't mean we agree with everything people say. Did you catch that? God yearns jealously over the spirit that He has made to dwell in us. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? We are not our own, for we were bought with a price. We glorify God by the righteousness we do…
I am reminded that today is the day after Jesus rode the donkey with the colt in tow into Jerusalem. There Jesus over turned tables–that happened to me yesterday. God showed me something that was not right in my life that I had not asked forgiveness for years ago. So I did. We need to ask Him to show us.
Jesus made all those robbing the temple get out, He cleansed the temple. That night He went out of Jerusalem to Bethany to lodge there. So today He woke up in Bethany and I woke up to share this with you.
I pray you are blessed by this journey. He told me I am a city set on a hill and to shine so we can praise Him! (Romans 8:38-39, Ephesians 5:1-2, 15 – 16, Romans 1:18 – 20, Colossians 1:15, James 3:15-16, 2 Corinthians 6:19, Ephesians 4:5, James 4:10, Matthew 21:17)
Let me attempt to explain.
I do not own any vehicle and have no furniture. I recently gave most of my savings away. I have no house nor husband, no kids and two suitcases of clothes in the USA with some storage in Thailand. I have some gifts from Thailand, a loaned camera, two iPhones -- one I am now paying off because I had to purchase it once I got to the USA last month. I recently paid my taxes and I have some money in my bank account… that's about it for material possessions.
So what do I have?
Jesus.
That's JESUS (period). And He is more than enough. God, the best Dad ever, has given me EVERYTHING I need for life and godliness.
Right now I am at the tip of an island point in Puget Sound watching the moon rise over the calm water. A strategically placed driftwood points back up at the moon like a hand gesturing to heaven. I could sit here all night talking to my Bridegroom. He's given me this place to live in this incredibly quiet neighborhood. He's given me this peace and this undeserved piece of heaven.
My Daily LIFE now
Not eating, so no responsibility to make any meals or times to plan when the next one is to come. It's summer break from school I teach at, so no lesson plans to put in order or strategic class classroom management moves to try to anticipate. I've been given a place to care for with all the amenities -- running water, hot shower, plenty of extra blankets for the chilly weather that I am getting accustomed to. Neighbors close enough, not not too close to sense safety but have silent nights.
A church community that is warm and on-fire for Jesus, with the same verse printed above their door that the Lord gave me a month before I knew this place even existed -- Matthew 11:28. I have such a quiet Spirit, I hear His voice so clearly, I've had plenty of opportunity for Him to display His power when I venture outside my brightly lit cabin paradise.
And, as if that isn't enough, Holy Spirit. Holy Spirit's intimate presence fills every minute, every room, every trail walk, every marina venture, every beach excursion -- there He is.
Everywhere. Even here right now as I write this. Next to me, in me, all around me, encouraging me to write every word. His beautiful unending presence.
Even if the moonlight has now been hidden by the clouds and I sit here in darkness on the beach, his light envelops me. I am His. He dwells in unapproachable light and that light surrounds me – and nothing anyone can say or do will ever change that.
That's the power of Jesus's blood. The all–consuming, never changing, Almighty power of the blood of Jesus Christ.
Before I knew Him and the POWER of His blood
That power took a lost, hurting, little girl, who tried to fill the void in her heart with what the world said: education, boyfriends, possessions, a great career, tons of friends -- all at of the cost of fear, condemnation, guilt and shame -- and He put my feet upon a rock. With an incurable virus, tons of debt, lonely nights, terrible thoughts of insignificance, insecurity and my future all followed close behind.
With the history of parents who didn't know Whose they were either -- an alcoholic dad who rarely showed up in my childhood and even less in my adolescence and with a mom addicted to drugs, alcohol and control of people–they separated when I was young. I felt abandoned, my mom raised me going to friends houses where they were doing drugs all the time, she wanted to give me life advice that I never wanted to agree with – even though I loved both of them, I became so fed up, so I felt like doing the opposite of what they said and rebelling. That was not better, but it put me on a path to try to figure out who this Jesus was that I never knew.
There I was.
Miserable.
Miserable but with a smile of vengeance on my face trying to prove this all–loving, ever-present and all-powerful myth of a Creator was concocted by a bunch of misguided lunatics who just needed something to take their pain away or blame their problems on. How could a good God allow me to be abused repeatedly at seven years old and then have "family friends" molest me into my teenage years. Where was this all–powerful Deity then, huh?!?
Then to know what I learned trying to prove Him false. I really found the Truth! The truth that this amazing all-loving God would create people in His image, prone to be like God, but that would abuse the free will that only a loving Father can give–and they would hurt the very ones they were supposed to love, protect and train in the way they should go…
The REALITY of SIN
God is not the cause of the destruction, problems or breakdown in the world. That's the enemy trying to reproduce himself in the hearts of us. And us, rebellious children that don't honor their parents or the One who created us. With just two simple guidelines: Love God and love people as He loves us.
FREE from Me
So that's where I am today. Free. Free from all the condemnation, guilt, shame and fear that not obeying God causes. Here I am living by the Spirit.
If Holy Spirit tells me to move, I'm free to move. I don't have any idols of the world, somebody else's opinion -- like a controlling spouse or unreasonable boss -- no schedules, or restraints of being in a hurry to get nowhere, I'm not controlled by my stomach or anyone else's, I go to bed when He tells me… I just get to listen to my Bridegroom, my best Friend, my Father, my King, my Judge, my Abba encourage me when I ask Him what's next?!?
Outside of a honeymoon, I can't describe this time any other way.
Does this have to end?
Well, the outpouring of his love won't. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
But in some respects, yes. It has to end, a little. I will eventually need to eat, start to work and be on a schedule to meet others to bless them and ask for their blessing for my future and the future of the projects that God is challenging us to believe for in Thailand, North Korea and in Asia. Yes, I will have to begin paying some bills, begin working where the Lord leads me, so I will have expectations and schedules of others to follow.
And in some respects, no. No, this honeymoon never has to end. Unbridled time with the lover of my soul, endless conversations about how in love with me He is, and receiving all the blessings He has to pour out, that time is the way He meant it. That's what the Bible says. It says in Psalm 139 that His thoughts outnumber all the grains of sand on the seashores in all the world.
Have you ever seen one seashore?
Just take the one I am on now. It's probably only half mile long and it's got a LOT of sand. I mean a LOTTA LOT. That's a lot of thoughts. If we could comprehend a handful of those thoughts even, it would blow our mind.
Just try it.
Take a handful of sand.
Start thinking about the person you love the most.
Pick up one grain of sand and start telling them those thoughts… See how far you get!
God loves me. He's thinking of me (and you!) and He's never going to stop for all of eternity! Wow! That's mind blowing.
And we're supposed to walk in that love.
As Jesus walked.
How I am to LIVE
Imitating our Dad, God, as beloved children. That's what beloved means -- walking in love as Jesus loved us. Giving himself up for us not with a stinky attitude of love – but a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.
Look carefully then and how you walk not as unwise but as wise. Making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. Be filled with the spirit, addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart. Giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, submitting to one another out of reverence to Christ.
Not grumbling or complaining, but letting from my mouth flow living water that blesses the hearer and reminds them Whose they are… Who created them holy and blameless without a single fault, above reproach before Jesus, if indeed they continue to walk in faith, stable and steadfast, not shifting from the hope which has been proclaimed in all creation under heaven. For The wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men who by their unrighteousness suppress the truth.
For what can be known about God is plain to them because God has shown it to them. For his invisible attributes, namely his eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived. Ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made. So they are without excuse.
And Jesus is the visible image of the invisible God the firstborn of all creation. For although the people knew God, they did not honor him is God or give thanks to Him, but they became futile in their thinking and started thinking about themselves and their foolish hearts were darkened. Claiming to be wise they became fools… their wisdom was earthly, and unspiritual, it was sensual, all about their feelings and demonic.
When we begin to say, "I feel like God is like this, and I think He would be okay with…" We need to be very sure that what comes next is wisdom that is pure, and peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by us who make peace and by what we say. And peace is speaking the truth in love, living by the Spirit– that dwells in us, as a temple of the living God.
God yearns jealously over the spirit that he is made to dwelling us, but God gives more grace. Because "He opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble." Submit yourselves therefore to God, living righteously. Then you resist the devil and he will flee. That humility needs to come as we say, "I think He'll be okay with…" Are we asking Him? Are we asking Holy Spirit what the Father is okay with? We need to humble ourselves before the Lord and he will exalt us. Our thinking can become His thinking when we ask…
To live peaceful doesn't mean we agree with everything people say. Did you catch that? God yearns jealously over the spirit that He has made to dwell in us. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? We are not our own, for we were bought with a price. We glorify God by the righteousness we do…
I am reminded that today is the day after Jesus rode the donkey with the colt in tow into Jerusalem. There Jesus over turned tables–that happened to me yesterday. God showed me something that was not right in my life that I had not asked forgiveness for years ago. So I did. We need to ask Him to show us.
Jesus made all those robbing the temple get out, He cleansed the temple. That night He went out of Jerusalem to Bethany to lodge there. So today He woke up in Bethany and I woke up to share this with you.
I pray you are blessed by this journey. He told me I am a city set on a hill and to shine so we can praise Him! (Romans 8:38-39, Ephesians 5:1-2, 15 – 16, Romans 1:18 – 20, Colossians 1:15, James 3:15-16, 2 Corinthians 6:19, Ephesians 4:5, James 4:10, Matthew 21:17)
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